In the life of an entertainer his whole being rests on the approval of people, he will never be anything without the people. His audience and fans are the people that made him whatever he is today so he has to go on living to meet up to their appeal. He knows the day he stops doing that is the day food stops coming to his table and his fame declines. His excess seeking for approval and the love of strangers sometimes make him lose the sense of self which drives him to the dark side.
Many of us might not be entertainers but we are all performers, performing for society in our everyday life and routine. Some are good performers and performing on their terms while some are really bad performers who really depend on the sight and applause of people to feel good and will continue to seek for approval.
Seeking for approval is a character that is hidden deep in our psyche and its origin doesn’t come from our adult age, this character started building and growing while we were young.
A lot of people didn’t grow up on love and no matter what they do to get recognized at that age, they just didn’t get that pat on the back for a good job done well. That hunger for that pat on the back still drives them into adult age
Seeking for approval becomes a disease of its own in our life and we go on engaging in it unconsciously while it ruins our life.
We find ourselves not being real with ourselves and with people, apart from it taking us far from our inner-self it also creates a huge amount of loss to our financial life. Some of us might be tired of living like this but how do we stop?
How to stop seeking for approval
First of all, you have to recognize that seeking for approval is a problem that has followed us since childhood and now hides deep down in our psyche while we engage in it unconsciously.
So for us to start solving this problem we have to recognize those situations that trigger this seeking of approval in us and the situation that makes us want to go out of ourselves and please people so we can be recognized.
Understand you have the power to change anything in life, understand that you are made of power and you are unique, nobody was created like you on earth, and share the same properties with you.
Start by being you and start by being comfortable with the person you find in the mirror and if you don’t like that person get to work to build your life, build it the way you want people to perceive you
Understand that people don’t complete you, you might be thinking you need someone out there to validate you before you know you or assume that you successful or good looking, but seriously you don’t need anyone to do that for you.
Wake up every day and validate yourself, speak life into yourself, and never doubt how great you are. You really don’t need anyone to believe in you, you got this
Nothing brings fulfillment in life and happiness like seeing our work bring results, especially when that work is about improving ourselves. When we begin to give our body and mind more attention we begin to build that confidence that we lack.
Aside from being comfortable with whatever you find when you look in the mirror you have to be contented and know you have got everything you need.
You don’t need to be kissing everybody’s fit to get accepted into a community, you have to take ownership of your decision and work towards your being independent financially and mentally
People can only recognize the person that recognizes himself or herself. when you are independent and worth knowing people easily gravitate to you.
You seek for approval because you want people to recognize you and you feel like you need to belong, but all this thing won’t come to you if you remain a people pleaser and scared of walking alone.
You have to go in and search for your inner-self then get comfortable with whatever you find while working to be better
This is where I end today’s article, I hope you had fun reading it and ready to implement this into your life. Remember this is an open discussion and your comment is expected.
You can check out my books, Why relationships fail (uncovering the truth and finding solution) here and 31 days of self-development (getting out of the victim mindset) here. A little investment into knowledge can be that great change you have waited all your life for.