Do you ever look at some people and wonder why they derive joy from telling the world that everything has happened to them and that’s the reason they are the way they are? These people would rather choose playing victim as a coping mechanism to get by life and society. They claim they are the way they are not for some positive reasons but for negative reasons. Now if this was you do you find life interesting with such an approach?.
You see we all go through things differently and we all have gone through things, will go through things, and going through things. Nobody on earth walks a comfortable road no matter how comfortable they seem to appear. Most of us out of our suffering have chosen the side of playing victim as a coping mechanism
First off, what is a coping mechanism? Copy mechanisms are the strategies people often use in the face of stress and/or trauma to help manage painful or difficult emotions. Coping mechanisms sometimes cannot be said to be a bad thing or the wrong way to face the issue at hand but in a scenario like playing the victim as a coping mechanism, we have to call the bluff on that.
People choose to remain a victim for so many reasons, some have gone through a lot that it is hard for them to see the brighter side and start choosing life with all its positivity, some choose to dwell on it like playing victim as a coping mechanism for whatever hidden motive they have beneath.
Things like a pity party or manipulating their way to get what they want are the main desire of choosing to walk on this path of victimhood. Though many conditions and reasons why this exist are lying deep in the unconscious mind of the people playing victim as a coping mechanism, many of the time, people want other people to know how much they have suffered and to be given that tender care.
Trying to cope and move around the world like a victim will never bring the things you think you deserve in your life. Trying to choose the hard way to everything in life so you can rub it on people’s faces won’t bring you the sympathy you think you deserve.
You know, let me tell you a story. I use to love playing victim as a coping mechanism when I was young, it brought me some sort of comfort in my irresponsibility. Not only did it remove me from being accountable for my actions it was so easy for me to place the blame on other people for my conditions.
I would do so much harm to friends and then go hide on being a victim, telling them we aren’t equal, that they are better and they should excuse my situation. This is the life of people who choose playing victim as a coping mechanism. It is really a sweet coping mechanism and makes you live empty of everything.
But this life gets you nowhere, nobody takes you seriously and you don’t even take yourself seriously enough. No bite to life, no substance to life because you are not standing on your two feet and taking responsibility for anything in your life.
How do you quit playing victim as a coping mechanism?
Just like I woke up one day and realize that nothing was actually working, I know many people out there are fed up with this life that brings no substantial reward.
Playing victim as a coping mechanism is like showing a losing card or betting on a losing horse. You are always going to lose and will continue losing till you start choosing how to be responsible for your actions, take accountability for your actions and stop rubbing your past on people’s faces.
Being accountable for your actions is not hiding from the consequences of it when things don’t go as planned. The majority of the things we do in this life will never go as planned and we are bound to offend people as much as we walk this earth. Rather than giving excuses for your mistakes and mishaps you should learn to own up to them and be accountable to them.
Being responsible for your actions is knowing that whatever decision you choose to throw out into the world that you are responsible for them and whatever way they choose to turn out in your life and people’s life.
When you realize that most of the decisions you make in this life don’t just end you with but goes on to affect other people you begin to be extra careful with things you put out and be responsible for them.
There are no excuses for treating people badly and there are no excuses for rubbing your past on their face. Enough of it, it isn’t bringing much progress into your life anyway. Doing this we have many people distrusting you and never paying you enough attention that you need in life.
This is where I end today’s article, I hope you had fun reading it and ready to implement this into your life. Remember this is an open discussion and your comment is expected.
You can check out my books, Why relationships fail (uncovering the truth and finding solution) here and 31 days of self-development (getting out of the victim mindset) here. A little investment into knowledge can be that great change you have waited all your life for