If you have been someone that has been a victim of anger this won’t come as a surprise to hear that it has brought much more harm than good in your life. It must have made you lose a lot of relationships either with friends or family and if not checked, redirected, or stopped it is bound to continue destroying the future ones.
One thing about anger you need to realize before going forward to start finding a remedy to it is that anger exists from our reaction to other’s actions. So the angered person is rather too invested in the actions of people and things outside of himself(herself) try to derive or seek for his or her meaning in the actions of others.
People do get angry at themselves, yes, this is a fact on its own but nobody gets so angry at Themselves that they self-destruct. I am not saying this is not possible, the self-destruction of self from hate of self is really possible but rare.
Our anger stems more from overreaction to the things we see around ourselves. Anger issues are just aggressive reactional responses. So the very possible way to start fighting anger is to start looking deep within ourselves and ask ourselves questions that deal with our reaction towards people and the situation.
I was talking with someone the other day who had a history of dramatic anger response, he was known to take little things too far and get angry at every little thing done to him or around him. Asking him why this exists and what inflates his blood pressure to always feel like punching people in the face and his reply to me was people are stupid and it is all people’s fault.
This is the problem with us humans, we never think it is our fault we always want to place whatever on the other man or strangers. But when you continue to put the blames on others you continue to miss the point of everything.
The approach in getting rid of anger
Let us discuss why you have anger issues or rather why you find yourself getting angry at every turn then find a solution to them
- Too many expectations:
You have lived life with too many expectations in the actions of people, you devote too much attention to the little details you are supposed to overlook and move on. Little things aren’t meant to irritate you you just make them irritate you, you choose to make them irritate you and it is nobody’s fault why you invoke that into your life.
To make yourself free from this, learn and try to live a carefree life. You live in a world of a billion-plus people with different backgrounds and heritage and beliefs, you can’t control everyone or things they do, it is a lost pursuit and you will always have your blood racing anytime you choose to control the actions of others.
Begin to overlook things more and when you start feeling irritated walkout or look the other way. Learn to breathe and let things slide.
- Too much interpretation
Your problem all your life is thinking that people actually know what they want and what they are doing, but just as unconscious as you are with your actions of anger that is how other people are unconscious with their actions of whatever they have going on.
You read too much into these actions and whatever they say and try to find meaning in them. All these reactions are always going to make you feel unhappy and angry at most.
To be free from this is to quit adding meaning into things and words of people, start seeing people as the imperfect beings they are on the inside. You are not perfect so why expect people to be perfect too. Give people the space to be human and remove whatsoever judgment you have.
What helps with anger?
When faced or confronted with issues that elevate your blood levels then understand it is time to breathe. Instead of sparking out and yelling on top of your voice, go sit somewhere and try to breathe.
This is where I end today’s article, I hope you had fun reading it and ready to implement this into your life. Remember this is an open discussion and your comment is expected.